It's somewhere along the lines of....

 I had realized that I have yet to blog this year, and after at least three feebile attempts, here it is.

2010 is upon us. I'm twenty now, still working part time at Farmers Insurance in Sun City, and have recently acquired a new job as a photographer for MVP Studios. While they are both fairly decent jobs, nothing is reliable and that has proven to be frustrating.

My darling boyfriend, Brandon, and I have reached the ten-month mark in our dating. Pretty crazy. And last week we had the most ridiculous fight over the most absurd topic, but whatever. It's said done and over with. A trip to the snow can fix anything [aside from a cold and achey joints]

School starts in two weeks, thank goodness. I am going a little bit crazy at home with nothing to do aside from FishVille. I will be taking 12 units online and then the remaining 3 will actually be in a photography room at RCC. I can't wait to transfer the hell out of community college.

And as for the first blog of the year, albeit one month late, here's the to-do list. :]

2010: The List!

[X 01.01] 1. Midnight New Years Kiss. [With three people, woot <3]
[ ] 2. Climb a damn tree.
[X 01.13] 3. Bouchon Bistro
[X 01.06] 4. Open a savings account.
[ ] 5. Not procrastinate.
[ ] 6. Yoga, at least three times a week.
[ ] 7. Rock the Air Force pre-boot camp work out.
[ ] 8. Mend a broken friendship, perhaps.
[ ] 9. Revive the art of letter-writing.
[ ] 10. Visit Irvine & stay at Jessica's cool new apartment.
[ ] 11. Grand Canyon.
[ ] 12. Get my car fixed.
[ ] 13. Actually find a reliable job.
[ ] 14. April 01, 2010.
[ ] 15. Take a photo every single day.
[ ] 16. Work on my knife skills.
[ ] 17. Cook dinner once a week, if not more.
[ ] 18. Cruiiiise.
[ ] 19. Disneyland.
[ ] 20. Go to the following beaches:
- La Jolla [X 01.10]
- Newport
- Balboa
- Santa Monica
- Malibu
- Huntington
- Carlsbad
- Catalina Island
- Mission Beach
- Oceanside
[ ] 21. Tattoo and/or piercing?
[ ] 22. Texas.
[ ] 23. Transfer application to a CSU or UC.
[ ] 24. Road Trip it.
[ ] 25. Warped Tour.
[ ] 26. Actually play the beautiful bass guitar I own.
[ ] 27. Pick up my flute more than once.
[ ] 28. Paint a pair of shoes.
[ ] 29. Learn more about photography & Photo Shop.
[ ] 30. Visit as many places as I can. [And take Brandon with me.]
[ ] 31. Longboard & not injure myself!
[ ] 32. Surf! Good grief.
[ ] 33. Skinny dip. Duh.
[ ] 34. Ice Skating.
[ ] 35. Planetarium.
[X 01.13] 36. Getty Museum.

Once you stop believing,

What actually keeps you from letting go indefinitely?

Is it something worth fighting for? Or is it the same argument over and over?

Is it knowing you can't be happy? Or is it knowing that the potential for that happiness is just around the corner?

This is something I do not want to lose my faith in. I need to get this idea out of my head, out of my heart. I can't sabotage myself because I know it'll be a decision that I deeply regret.


Yet, I am thinking about it. =/


Definately some over-analyzing. It'll all be okay in the morning... It always is.

Randon side note;

I'm sitting in my mother's third grade class room & just did some photos of her kidlettes. My mom isn't even here, as she had to go to some meeting.

The kids don't seem to like the sub, he can't quite get them to be quiet, while I on the other hand told them it was far too loud & they immediately shushed. Well, they whispered, "That's Mrs. Sanchez's daughter" about a billion times.

Kids are hilarious.

Soon, I'll be off to work to take more photos of kids. :]

Insane or a Genious?

Lovelife - Atmosphere.


Individually wrapped, placed in neat little rows
Becoming A piece, of everything that grows
Some numbers, A name, to indicate you played the game
Came empty handed and left the same
A soul is A soul and A shell is A shell
The border in between is full of everything you felt
Some cling to A cross because they're tired and lost
They leave it up to the weather to measure the cost
And everytime I look within I recognize the darkness
Familiar to the image of the artist
Staring at the bathroom mirror in A strangers apartment
Can't remember her name, don't remember how I got here
But here I am, thinking about death again
Humbles out the stress, helps the breath get in
I need to check my friends as well as my next of kin
To let them know I love them all to the end
And when the soul begins to reap, I think she'll know me from the sleep
I keep caught in the corner of my bloodshot eyes
And if she has the nerve, to let me dump a couple last words
I'm gonna turn to the earth and scream "Love your life!"
Love your life, quite cliche but I guess thats me
A ball of pop culture with some arms and feet
As discrete as I've tried to keep the drama and cancer
It's no secret I hunger for someone to feed the answers
I never expected a bowl of cherries
I'm just a virgo trying to find my own version of the virgin mary
And when I let them carry me to a cemetary
I wanna be buried with a pocket full of clarity

[Chorus]
Now, how many times must you prove you're an angel
How many more demons do you have to strangle
How much longer must you remain in this dream
Before I finally figure out if you're insane or a genius

How many times must you prove you're an angel
How many more demons do you have to strangle
How much longer must you remain in this dream
Before I finally figure out if you're insane or a genius

Let no tears to fall from none of y'all
Just remember it all, the beauty as well as the flaws
L-O-V-E L-I-F-E
Here lies Sean, finally free
And as I look across the sea I smile at the sun
While it feeds the weeds the nutrition they need
The people still breathe, the city still bleeds
I'm going to love it to death and keep planting my seeds
I'm going to love it to death and keep an eye on the seeds
I'll be in love till im dead, I keep reaching the seeds
I'll give all I got left just to teach you to read
Love life to the death and keep planting my seeds
And when the soul begins to reap, I think she'll know me from the sleep
I keep caught in the corner of my bloodshot eyes
And if she has the nerve, to let me dump a couple last words
I'm gonna turn to the earth and scream (Love your life)

Don't Lose This. Seriously.

The night before Halloween, I was trifling through my mother's jewelry box to find some additional decorations for my buccaneer attire. My attempts to find some gaudy gemstones were in vain, due to the fact that my fingers are far too small for my mother's jewelry. However, we did manage to find a couple of old rings, that were my mother's before she had "grown up hands".

One ring was a simple, thin gold band with a dark red ruby. The other was a thinker gold band, with a layer of white gold, that was pressed and had a very interesting pattern on it. It was reflective, and simple and very elegant.

Delighted I had found rings that fit on my size four fingers, I asked my mother if she was alright with me taking them as adornment for my costume.
Her response was yes, but as she examined the rings on my hand, she said I had better not lose the fat-banded ring on my left hand. As it so happened, the ring on my hand was my grandmother's original wedding band; The one she wore when she was nineteen.
She then continued to tell me that my grandfather would upgrade her wedding ring every time he had the money saved up. Her other wedding rings are beautiful, gold, covered with three rows of diamonds, but this one is special. It's not "blinged", as my 63-year-old grandma would say. It's simple. It's dainty. It was their first bond of love.

This whole "love" thing is quite the experience. I'm enjoying the ride, and I do hope my boyfriend is as well. It's proven to be an adventure worth taking thus far, and I cannot wait to see where and how far it takes us.

Finding this ring has allowed me to really get a grasp on that. Rich, poor, somewhere in between, love will help you get through. This ring is plain. There are no diamonds, no gems at all. But it still shines after forty-some odd years of marriage.

One day I hope I have a ring similar, that my granddaughter will find with trifling through her mum's jewelry.

I Got Nuthin'.

Literally nothing to say right now.

But my background is pretty. :]

Dear Darla,

Congratulations.

I like the beach. It never ceases to please me, even at a remarkable ninety-one degrees. It's okay, I forgive you. Haha. Brandon and I had a delightful time yesterday. We went for a couple hours, just for the hell of it. Doing things like that are the best. Just because you can. Definate favourite.

I must say though, that sinus headaches are not okay. I think I might go take a nap. Wonderful!

Hope things are well on your end.

Every thing is perfect here.

Love,
Analeigh.